she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Randomize
