saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
