Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I would fuck him just for his dog
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Randomize
