Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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