i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Randomize
