Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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