i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
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