Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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