Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Randomize
