Whod you bang
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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