Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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