you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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