we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Terrible idea I love it
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
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