apparently the secret to your success is patron
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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