Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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