come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
