I am in a vortex of obligation.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
