Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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