took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
i barfeds in our rink
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Randomize
