dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
