How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize