i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Randomize
