I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize