You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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