why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize