dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
