remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
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