I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
