My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
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She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
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They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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