I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize
