a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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