thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize