and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
