Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
