I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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