Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
