craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
