A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Randomize