Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize