am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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