And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
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