I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize