Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
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