Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
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