Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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