At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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