My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
