I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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