My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Oh, the accent alone guaranteed a bj. It was when he started drunkenly singing in PERFECT PITCH that I knew I was fucking him.
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