I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
Randomize
