does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
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